3 days remain

LJ just ate what I had typed out dammit.
( morbid dwelling on 9-11-01 )

Fuck. I said I wasn't going to get like this tonight. The original thought was something along the lines of the farther away the event, the less real it seems. Or the less meaning it has for the observer. My father died nearly 20 years ago. December 2nd used to be this big day of mourning for me. Now, half the time, I forget the signifigance altogether. 5-17-97 was the last time I saw a man I sometimes think of as the closest thing I have to a soulmate. The only reason I remember the date is an old fading journal entry I made the next day. All things fade over time. I think it's quite possibly the only reason we remain sane rational beings.

Great, I guess it's my week to be the ray of darkness.

Hugs to all my homies. May joy and peace find you.

James

This post is safe to ignore...

I'm rather sure a few people will read this anyway. More power to you.

There have been a few places in my life where I feel like I've walked in halfway through the movie, and now I'm playing catch up, trying to figure out the 411 on the situation.

One was Lambda at WSU, since most of the people who were around when I joined had a tangled history of their own. I never did figure out why three people I looked up to hated each other so much.

More recently, arguements between members of the old coven. Trying very hard to figure out what subtext I'm missing here and there. Why certain people fight tooth and nail. Why no one looks beyond their own nose at what lies before them. Why approaching related topics sets off a flame war. Damn Ivory Towers.

Oh, and of no use whatsoever, Eddings has used "sardonically" 7 times and "blandly" 1 time so far. I have about 20 pages to go.