*Grumble*

Why is it people get so offended when I start talking about changing my religious affiliation? Would people get upset if I suddenly declared myseld Buddahist? Why is going monotheistic such a crime? Yes, I'm pagan. I have been for 7 years now. I was Xtian for 18 years prior to that. Why is it such a big deal I'm getting interested in Judaism? Why can't I explore what it is I believe in peace? Hell, if you want to nail it down, I always thought that the various pantheons were just aspects of a greater divinity. No one ever said that God couldn't do something like that if God so chose. Or more to the point, what if the great divinity I've been pondering the past 26 years is nothing more than connective tissue? I've pretty much discounted Xtianity, since a good majority of its current dogma has no real relavence in my life. I've studied Islam, but again, most of it bears no real relation to what and how I believe. It does, however produce spectacular art and Arabic (the written word) is quite possibly the most wonderous thing I have ever seen. The problem I keep running into with paganism is hubris, as so many people I know get in these "my psychic penis is bigger than yours" debates that detract seriously from my enjoyment of practitioning. That and a real lack of desire to learn and experement among those I have talked to on occasion. Personally, I'm reaching a point in my life where I'm ready to explore other vistas. Polytheism will still be there whether or not I decide to leave it. And you can take me out of polytheism, but you can't take polytheism out of me. The things which I would take with me would be A) a sense of responsibility for my own actions, B) a love of learning and discussing what it is I have learned, and C) ways to create my own reality. One man's magic is another man's minor miracle.
I guess it just irks me that people seem to think I'm a bad person for trying to find a way to grow in my faith rather than stagnating in something that I've been growing beyond for a while now. Just as Xtianity is no longer where I belong, I think paganism is something that I'm fitting into less and less. I bear no ill will to those who follow it. It was where I belonged. And there are others who will still need it when I am gone. I just have to follow the path I need to follow right now. I have no idea where i's going, but the road is always interesting.