*sighs*

Jan. 8th, 2014 01:27 pm
gangrel_pri: (me)
[personal profile] gangrel_pri
Well, a friend of mine writes a psychology blog, and his post today struck an old nerve with me.

See, I remember studying the Dysfunctional Family model back at Teen Institute, except we had the heads of household included. You know, Addict and Co-dependent. At larger events, we'd expand out the model to include the larger community in it's relations to the core family. Things like the judge sentencing the scapegoat to jail time, or myself and my friend Tammy as neighbors going to each kid and going "Here's a cookie! Your daddy's just sleeping!"

In truth, growing up with my mom, who displayed most of the symptoms of co-dependency (I think the addict in the model would be my hated uncle), I usually got stuck in the role of Mascot or Lost child. Yeah, I scapegoated a few times, and occasionally played the hero, but most of my role growing up was either staying the fuck out of sight or using humor to try to defuse the situations as the arose.

This has largely carried over into my adult life. I mean yes, I have a temper and am quite capable of asserting myself when pushed too far, but for the most part, I either hide or try to make a joke about things when shit gets rough. So many actions of my adult life have been attempts to deflect focus off of myself.

Anyway, enough about me. Off to shower.

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